Top 10 Dating Tips for Shy Girls
Single guys and gals can attest: it is tough to meet someone great out there!
If you are the quiet type, it’s even more difficult, which is why you must take advantage of these top ten dating tips for shy girls.
Not only will they help you feel comfortable getting into the pool of romantics, you’ll be able to swim comfortably into the kind of relationship you deserve with a great guy.
And, before you know it, you will be a seasoned pro helping someone else come out of their shell.
Paint a Picture of Mr. Right
This first tip is one that goes across dating lines from the most outgoing to the painfully shy: know what is important to you in a potential mate. If you ask most people, they will probably trot out the clichés like “a nice smile” and “great sense of humor,” but those are rather superficial characteristics.
What sort of interests would you like to share with the guy you meet? Is he into sports? Does he like reading science fiction? Knowing the answers to these questions will help you keep from wasting time with the wrong men.
There’s No Pressure
It might take you a while for you to become accustomed to the idea of being out “on the prowl” but you should not feel like you have to jump off a cliff right away. Take your time building up to the bigger steps – you wouldn’t, say, want to go on a random blind date – by opting for baby steps that gradually get you out of your comfort zone.
Keep in mind you don’t have to go through it alone. Start out by joining a bunch of friends for dinner, then work your way down to heading to the bar with a friend before flying solo (if you ever do).
Be Flattered
When you finally are approached, you must first and foremost realize it is a compliment! Put aside all your nervousness for the moment and just bask in the glory of having a guy make contact. It probably seems like a rather trivial thing to put on a list of dating tips, but many shy girls lose track of the benefits of being female – a man must come talk to you, not the other way around – by becoming too focused on saying the right things.
Further, take a moment to imagine how difficult it would be for you to approach someone. The guy who is talking to you knows that feeling all too well. Show some appreciation for his courage.
Understand Your Own Worth
The stereotype for shy people is that they aren’t all that confident in themselves, which is why they are always along the fringes of parties or struggling to integrate themselves in social situations. Whether or not that is true for you, you would do well to remember you are a catch. No one, regardless of how charming or good-looking, should treat you as though they are doing you a favor by talking to you.
If you find yourself being hit on by one of “those guys,” politely excuse yourself and connect with someone else. Can he not take the hint? Give him a fake phone number.
Flirt Some…and then Flirt Some More
Almost everybody feels like they are terrible at the playful side of meeting someone for the first time. (Those who don’t are the ones that are the worst at it.) Do your best to engage the guy you have your eye on with some banter and accept that not every line can be a winner. If you say something that falls flat, laugh it off and change the subject. Much like sports or a musical instrument, practice makes perfect.
The key to this dating tip? Make fun of yourself way more than him. If you say something he takes offense to, you might be in search of another guy before long.
Take a Break When You Need It
Since you are a shy girl, the stress of dating is likely to be magnified – possibly off the charts, even. If you start feeling like the walls are closing around you, head somewhere to get time to yourself. This might mean a prolonged trip to “freshen up” in the bathroom or maybe a brief step outside to breathe in the night air.
By doing this, you will have the opportunity to unwind for a few minutes before heading back into the fray. It might seem rude or unorthodox, but it’s actually a good thing: you will be noticeably more relaxed, which will make you more appealing to the guy you are with.
You Set the Pace
Every relationship moves at its own speed, yet it is guided by the two people involved in it. If they are good with leaping from one stage to the next in a flash, that is perfectly acceptable. It is just as well if they take their time, too. The key for you is to make sure you are aware of how you feel in the moment.
Is your head spinning? Do you feel rushed? If you have an underlying sense of confusion or doubt, slow things down. A guy who really wants to be with you will respect your needs. And, when you are comfortable, you are more likely to develop the sort of emotional intimacy necessary to make a relationship last.
Speak Your Mind Often
Of all of these dating tips for shy girls, this might be the most difficult for you to handle. Most people have trouble saying exactly what they think, especially in a new relationship, which is why you must overcome the tendency to accept everything and tell your guy what is on your mind. Has he been inconsiderate in choosing movies when you go out? Would you prefer he didn’t talk so much while the two of you are out for a hike?
What this comes down to, really, is getting into good communication habits (the kind necessary for a successful relationship). If you are unwilling to stand your ground on what is important to you, then your happiness will be walked all over.
Keep Your Guard Up Some
Though you have taken a big step by getting out into the wide world of dating, it is important that you don’t rush out too far before you are really emotionally ready for it. Sad as it is to say, there are plenty of men out there who will earn the trust of shy girls only to manipulate them and break their hearts. Yes, there is always a possibility of pain when you start searching for romance, but be aware some (in both genders) care for little more than themselves – other people are just objects for their desires.
How can you spot the bad one in a good group? If a guy doesn’t really attempt to learn more about you beyond the basics of where you are from and what you do or constantly seems distracted while you talk, he probably does not really care what you have to say, a very bad sign.
Enjoy Yourself
Ultimately, this is the tip shy girls need most when it comes to dating: have some fun! The experience of locating the right person can be infuriating sometimes, yet it should always be treated as an adventure – one that leads you to a well-earned Happily Ever After.
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